The Pastas

7/50

7/50
Spaghetti seamlessly covered in Marinara
Comments

This pasta review is currently under construction. Sorry for the delay, I promise it will be worth the wait.

6/50

6/50
Marinara mixed with Spaghetti
Comments

This pasta review is currently under construction. Sorry for the delay, I promise it will be worth the wait.

Hoplite

Hoplite
Fettuccine saturated in Five Cheese Marinara
Comments

A white shield, emblazoned with a fiery orange sun. The points of a four-pronged triden gleam in the light, ready to strike. Ready your dinner and eat hearty!

5/50

5/50
Spaghetti coated in Marinara
Comments

This pasta review is currently under construction. Sorry for the delay, I promise it will be worth the wait.

Gravity Well

Gravity Well
Alfredo enriched with vitamin Chicken Fritta, enveloped by a cave, boy! A cave of Gluten Free Rotini
Comments

A trick of perspective causes the eye to "sink into" this pasta, which, reportedly, "tastes just like macaroni and cheese".

4/50

4/50
Marinara refreshingly dropped on a ball the size of a chihuahua's head of Spaghetti
Comments

This pasta review is currently under construction. Sorry for the delay, I promise it will be worth the wait.

A Chicken & Two Chicks!

A Chicken & Two Chicks!
Cavatappi swimming in Creamy Mushroom, sensuously crossbred with Grilled Chicken
Comments

Let's not forget that the meat on our plates was once the living tissue of a sentient being that did not want to die. Tasty though they may be, chickens live lives of near-constant suffering and then are killed so we can have something chewy to go with our pasta.

So, y'know, take home the leftovers, at least.

3/50

3/50
Marinara gently tucked away inside a hill of Spaghetti
Comments

This pasta review is currently under construction. Sorry for the delay, I promise it will be worth the wait.

The Mixup

The Mixup
Chicken Fritta drowning in Creamy Mushroom, tossed on a handful of Rigatoni
Comments

When it comes to sauce distribution, sometimes the chef loves you, and sometimes you have to forge your own path. In this case, it is clear that Jessica was forced into the latter option; some of these rigatoni are bone-dry, and others have entered into an unnatural state that is more sauce than pasta.

Be wary when ordering this dish - you never know what's in the next forkful.

2/50

2/50
Marinara swathed in a hill of Spaghetti
Comments

This pasta review is currently under construction. Sorry for the delay, I promise it will be worth the wait.

A Big Bowl of Cheese Puffs

A Big Bowl of Cheese Puffs
Five Cheese Marinara uniquely garnished lavishly with Italian Sausage, blended with Rigatoni
Comments

A satisfying thing to munch on absentmindedly, but not what most would call fine dining. Apparently, you can get halfway through this dish without even realizing you were eating!

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