The Pastas

7/50

7/50
Marinara placed upon a pile of Spaghetti
Comments

This pasta review is currently under construction. Sorry for the delay, I promise it will be worth the wait.

6/50

6/50
Spaghetti mixed with Marinara
Comments

This pasta review is currently under construction. Sorry for the delay, I promise it will be worth the wait.

Hoplite

Hoplite
Fettuccine glazed with Five Cheese Marinara
Comments

A white shield, emblazoned with a fiery orange sun. The points of a four-pronged triden gleam in the light, ready to strike. Ready your dinner and eat hearty!

5/50

5/50
Spaghetti sauced with Marinara
Comments

This pasta review is currently under construction. Sorry for the delay, I promise it will be worth the wait.

Gravity Well

Gravity Well
Chicken Fritta coated in Alfredo, dropped on a cave, boy! A cave of Gluten Free Rotini
Comments

A trick of perspective causes the eye to "sink into" this pasta, which, reportedly, "tastes just like macaroni and cheese".

4/50

4/50
Spaghetti expertly crossbred with Marinara
Comments

This pasta review is currently under construction. Sorry for the delay, I promise it will be worth the wait.

A Chicken & Two Chicks!

A Chicken & Two Chicks!
Cavatappi pleasantly adorned with Grilled Chicken, coated in Creamy Mushroom
Comments

Let's not forget that the meat on our plates was once the living tissue of a sentient being that did not want to die. Tasty though they may be, chickens live lives of near-constant suffering and then are killed so we can have something chewy to go with our pasta.

So, y'know, take home the leftovers, at least.

3/50

3/50
Spaghetti showered in Marinara
Comments

This pasta review is currently under construction. Sorry for the delay, I promise it will be worth the wait.

The Mixup

The Mixup
Chicken Fritta accentuated with a generous portion of Rigatoni, drowning in Creamy Mushroom
Comments

When it comes to sauce distribution, sometimes the chef loves you, and sometimes you have to forge your own path. In this case, it is clear that Jessica was forced into the latter option; some of these rigatoni are bone-dry, and others have entered into an unnatural state that is more sauce than pasta.

Be wary when ordering this dish - you never know what's in the next forkful.

2/50

2/50
Spaghetti drizzled with Marinara
Comments

This pasta review is currently under construction. Sorry for the delay, I promise it will be worth the wait.

A Big Bowl of Cheese Puffs

A Big Bowl of Cheese Puffs
Rigatoni nigh-erotically sauced with Five Cheese Marinara, embedded with Italian Sausage
Comments

A satisfying thing to munch on absentmindedly, but not what most would call fine dining. Apparently, you can get halfway through this dish without even realizing you were eating!

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