Day -12
Hey, pasta fans!
If you're reading this, you're likely a fan of the quest I completed last year. I'd like to do something similar again with this year's pass, but with a fun new gimmick (more on that later). Unfortunately, the Pastas That Be did not see fit to ordain me thus.
That's where you come in! Today only the OG is running a contest where they will give a pass to the person who is most deserving, by community vote. It would truly mean the world to me if you could take a bit of your day and write me in. Just refer to me as "Vino, from the blog www.allofgarden.com " and explain why you believe I'd make the best use out of the pass.
The best part? If your entry is the one that wins me a pass, you get a pass of your very own!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Let's make some magic happen, people. And by magic, I mean empty carbs.
Please share this around on social media, if you know anyone else who would be helpful
Day -17: Dawn Of A New Era
Hello again, pasta pals. It's good to talk to you again after all this time. I'm sure you have questions; here, briefly, are a few answers.
-Yes, I have heard
-No, I don't have one yet. There was a bit of a mixup where I was not informed of its availability. I am certain this is a minor oversight and will be corrected shortly.
-125
Stay tuned...
Day 49, Part Two
Dinner was Finale.
Thank you for dining with me.
Finale
My God -- it's full of carbs!
Pictured here is Finale: the end.
Day 49, Part One
Just thought I'd sneak in a few more.
Lunch was composed of two plates of pasta.
Viva Italia
Grown Up Meal For Big Boys
Dinner soon...
A special thanks to my dining companion, Molly!
Viva Italia
If you bring up Olive Garden's name in the right company, you'll get a smug eyeroll and a comment about "real" Italian food. I've never traveled further out of my tiny apartment than it takes to get to Olive Garden, and I don't ever plan to venture out that far again - but I think I know a thing or two about exotic cuisine. And I can say there's nothing more Italian than noodles that are vaguely the color of the Italian flag.
Pictured here is Viva Italia - "OG Rep!" (italian for "bon appetit")
Grown Up Meal For Big Boys
I was impressed by this surprisingly adult offering. The lack of breading on the chicken, and the dearth of a thick cheese goo "sauce" make for a dish that you could mistake for a presentation by a 3-star Italian restaurant (if you had just spent the past 49 days eating nothing but Olive Garden).
Pictured here is Grown Up Meal For Big Boys, and I ate it all by myself!
Day 48
It seems like just yesterday I began the journey of a thousand noodles, and now that only a single bowl remains, my wandering into Olive Garden seemed aimless, distracted. As I sat down at my table, a nameless waitress approached me, fear obvious in her eyes.
"Sir, I -"
"Please," I interrupted. "I've been here for 7 weeks now. You can call me Vino."
"I...um...Vino, I-"
"No, no, actually, go back to sir."
"Sir. I don't know how to say this. Um." She paused, took a deep breath. "We are out of pasta. You...you ate it all. We can bring you something, but they'll be a little different. Substitutions. Please forgive us."
Lunch was skipped.
Dinner was composed of three plates of pasta:
Buca-tiny
Primo-vera
Grande-Sized Number Six Combo With Diet Coke
I felt a sense of emptiness. This wasn't right. It was delicious, but it wasn't what I needed: the final bowl. The culmination of everything I'd been building the past seven weeks.
Tomorrow.
A special thanks to my dining companion, Vinegar!
Buca-tiny
I took a bite of the first pasta, and immediately coughed it out, my finely-tuned pasta senses detecting a slight variation in the noodle. This wasn't spaghetti at all. The waitress attempted to assuage me.
"Sir, it's bucatini. It's pretty much exactly spaghetti but it has subtle ridges, and it's hollow."
"Hollow? Cheaping out on me, Olive Garden? After all the thousands of dollars of your food I've eaten for free, this is how you repay me?"
"Sir, if you'd just please stop shouting, I'd be more than happy to -"
"Plus, these noodles are so small! Hey! More like Buac-TINY!"
I can't wait to put that one in the blog, I thought to myself.
Pictured here is buca-tiny, and the name's just as witty now as it was six hours ago!
Primo-vera
I was not prepared for this. A sauce with actual vegetables in it? With spices that my deadened palate can actually pick up? Garlic?!
I am not at all exaggerating when I say that this is my favorite sauce I have tried in the past 7 weeks, and I weep that I had to eat 30 bowls of 5 cheese marinara before I got to it.
Pictured here is Primo-vera - also, try it on your breadsticks! Waow!
Grande-Sized Number Six Combo With Diet Coke
"Oh, God! Something's horribly wrong with my shrimp! Waiter!"
"It's grilled, sir. Some people find it a lighter option than the breading. It should take this bowl of giant rigatoni and thick dairy-based sauce down from 1900 calories to a slim 1800."
"Wow! Look at me, I'm friggin' anorexic over here! Order me a second one, just in case."
Pictured here is Grande-Sized Number Six Combo With Diet Coke - skip the salad, you've earned it!
Day 47
In the hustle and bustle of my fast-paced pasta-scarfing existence, it's easy to forget the most important thing: family.
Now, I don't have a "traditional" family*. But I do have the staff at the Olive Garden. If the OG's advertising campaign from the 90's can be trusted (and if not, can anything be?) they're more family to me than anyone else.
So, this blog is a shoutout to the servers, the bartenders, the managers, the door-holder-openers, all of you guys! You've made the past seven weeks much more fun than they should have been. I hope you find today's pastas as cheesy as this blog.
Lunch was Icarus.
Dinner was composed of two plates of pasta:
*When I was twelve, my parents were both crushed to death during a routine tour of an Olive Garden shipping facility by an unsecured crate of Italian sausages. On that day I swore that I would get vengeance by eating every last one, as soon as it was economically feasible. The day the Pasta Pass was announced was the beginning of my new life.
A special thanks to my dining companion, Vino!